Well it's official now, I will be deploying to the Persian Gulf this summer. I'll get there when it's just getting good and hot. It's been 5 or 6 years since I've experienced 120+ degree weather.
It's weird the internal struggles that a man goes through. On one hand, I don't want to go. I don't want to miss birthdays, anniversaries, Thanksgiving, Christmas. I want to be here to take Brendan fishing and build things with him. To take Corbin camping and watch him continue to grow and learn. I want to be here to help Candace love them and discipline them. Most times they take things a little more serious when it comes from dad. I want to be here to work in the yard with Candace, to take after dinner walks, to talk into the night, to make love to her. Pray for Candace and the boys in my absence.
But, on the other hand, I am looking forward to the deployment. There is nothing that makes a man feel more alive than to be doing what he was meant to do. To have a clear goal and purpose. To suffer and sweat and work with a team of men toward a common goal. When you spend every waking moment with a group of people, they become your family. I joined the military to make a difference, to help those who can't help themselves, to have an adventure, to serve. Now I am getting that chance again.
I also know that God will use me where I am being sent. I know that it will be a time of spiritual growth for me. Pray that I will have the courage to listen to what God has to tell me and follow
where he wants to lead me.
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7 months ago